The Trick to Success in New Roles Is Not What You Think
I started a new job two weeks ago. I am so excited about this role and everything that is ahead. I have to admit though, even with all of that, starting a new job is one of the most disorienting human experiences. There is little I find more uncomfortable than being new.
Excitement is obviously present. However, underneath that is a quiet tangle of performance pressure, identity shifts, the desire to prove myself, and the belief that I should be running at 100 percent by week two. It is wild when you think about it. I expect to walk into an environment full of new systems, norms, culture, personalities, and expectations… and then immediately act like I have been at it for years.
Fortunately, the most common advice I have ever gotten or given, as a leader and as a coach, is this: Give yourself permission to be new.
Not new, but performing perfectly.
Not new, but memorizing every system instantly.
Not new, but silently carrying the weight of implicit expectations.
Just… new.
Because new is a legitimate developmental state. It is not a flaw, not incompetence, and not a character test. The first weeks are supposed to be awkward, exploratory, and full of uneven energy. That is literally what adaptation looks like.
When we strip people of that permission, or strip it from ourselves, we create conditions for unnecessary shame and self judgment. We override curiosity. We suppress real questions. We rush belonging. We become rigid at the very moment flexibility matters most.
- We ask better questions.
- We observe more accurately.
- We build relationships more honestly.
- We understand the system before trying to fix it.
- We give our nervous systems a chance to settle and calibrate.
There is a humility to being new that is actually strategic. You only get this phase once. It becomes the foundation for everything that comes after.
As I step into my own new role, I am realizing how much I need this reminder. Even with decades of leadership behind me, my brain still tries to default to, “You should already know this.” But why? How? According to whom?
The truth is simple: Being new is not a weakness. Being unwilling to be new is.
So this week, I am practicing my own advice. Giving myself permission to be new. Letting myself observe before I optimize. Allowing the awkwardness rather than rushing to competence. Trusting that clarity comes from presence, not performance.
And if you are in a season of beginnings, whether it is a new job, a new project, a new identity, or a new chapter, I hope you give yourself that permission too.
You do not have to arrive fully formed.
You just have to arrive.